Without going into the intricacies of metapsychology canto say that the reason for this perception of ourselves and the world are poor relationship with the mother or the person it is replaced, that a person experienced in early childhood. For various reasons: their own depression, heavy feelings at this time, severe anxiety, etc. mother could not be sufficiently sensitive to the emotional needs of their child, to respond adequately to their needs. A mother to the child during infancy - it is the whole world, the relationships that are established with his mother to a certain extent the prototype of all subsequent relationships. Regular experience of understanding and adequately meet the needs, both physical and emotional, creates a picture of the world understand, accept that you can trust. Conversely, the lack of such an experience for the child becomes evidence that the world is cruel, uncomprehending, frustrating, it can not be trusted. But at the same time it leads to the fact that the child finds himself not good enough, unworthy of love. There is another source of this "badness". Frustration (disappointment, causing pain) cause resentment, anger, but in this situation the child does not dare to express these feelings to his mother, afraid to disappoint her, even destroy, he feared that it will cease to love, punished, mom disappears. Then this anger and hatred does not occur outside, and directed inwards on itself, resulting in the perception of ourselves as poor.
If a child is really losing some ofparents due to divorce, death, it automatically creates a confidence in him that this disaster happened because of him, because he was not good enough, did something bad. Therefore, when a child does not discuss such a situation, even a little, he will explain everything to myself and then life will live with the unconscious guilt.
In fact, what kind of relationship we establish with people,How to choose the objects of love, a very important role played by those models of relationship that we imbibed with mother's milk. For example, perceiving itself bad, people will try all to himself to prove that he is good, strive to be appreciated and loved. He needs a partner who will zalatyvat his narcissistic wounds. But, at the same time, unconsciously, that person can find themselves such partners, which will depreciate it, throw, thereby confirming its badness.
Similar mechanisms work and depression. In this case, there is a fixation on early relationships, not enough satisfactory. Depression is always associated with the experience of loss, the loss of: lover, relationship with him, as well as with any disappointment, frustration, illusion. In all these cases, the person loses something, to which he was very emotionally attached. If the experience of the early relationship with his mother was strong, not too disappointing, in these difficult situations a person is experiencing grief, he grieves, mourns the loss, but then directs his interest and love for something new. In this case there is no depression. Here we see the impossibility to separate, let it go. Although in reality this man is no longer, it seems to continue to exist within a person. Continue internal dialogue, reproaches, accusations that are directed at himself. It seems that everything was the fault of the person, it is bad, do something wrong, perhaps should atone. The main symptom of depression - in a bad mood; not in the mood, the mood at anyone and anything, it is impossible to love, there is no desire to establish relations, nothing is of interest. This is because the human heart is not free, it still left the love of his subject.
Mania is an attempt to draw the depressionContrary thus mania - a protection against depression. It is characterized by the triumph of I am the object, when I no longer depends on the object of love. The man then feels his omnipotence, the ability to control and subdue the subject, from which, and by the love which he had depended so.